Thomas Gordon of the Parent Effectiveness Training Program first suggested these three steps:
(1) Say clearly how you feel, what you want, what you need or what you expect.
(2) Describe the observable problem or behavior.
(3) Explain the consequences or results of the behavior.
Here is an example:
(1) I feel rushed when in a one-week period I’m given four or five proposals to which I’m supposed to plan graphics.
(2) When I have to ‘beef-up’ that many documents, I find myself just grabbing graphics and not really giving the concepts much thought.
(3) Then the proposals go out to our clients half-baked. They’re not up to the standards we’ve set.
With this three-part statement, the focus is on the action and consequences rather than on who’s doing what.
Communicate with Confidence,